It's been a crazy long hard road from the Cresent to the Duke. There are a lot of things that are good here and a lot that I would love to forget. That's alright though since it is part of growing as a person, part of becoming who we are as individuals. So, let's recap the last five weeks shall we:
1. I finally became the thing I hate the most - the Psycho Ex-Girlfriend. Yup, I did it, I crossed that line and became an asshat extraordinaire once again. Phew. Lessons learned I tell ya, lessons learned. You really figure out who you can trust and who you can't during a tumultuous break-up and you become really surprised about the people you can't. It's amazing how many people say they're behind you and supporting you only to find out they're two-faced and trouble makers themselves. Ahhh well, it's all part of their process of growth too. It's just too bad that the ones who promised support called me an embarrassment and walked away from me. Huh? Yeah, I'm thinking the same thing as you guys....forget them and move on.
2. I became an insane Momma-Bear. Holy shit! I knew I was a protective mother but this is ridiculous. I have been like a cloud of custodial protection hovering over my kids these last few weeks. No one, and I seriously mean, NO ONE is ever going to expose my babies to things that they just shouldn't be seeing. Things that they are certainly not ready for. Expect a crazy, screaming banshee of a freakshow mom to put a stop to anything she thinks her babies can't handle. I have officially lost my mind in the Mommy department. I guess if I wasn`t an over-protective, over-bearing mom there would be something wrong. Right...hmmm....
I had a number three but I was just interupted by a long phone call and now the whole point of my little rant and rave session here has totally been lost. The mood to be the strong, independent, growling, empowered-by-estrogen woman is lost and I`m suddenly content to just sit here and watch a movie. Yeah, mood swings. Stress induced, hormone filled mini-rages that always come to a very anti-climatic end; usually me throwing my hands up and exclaiming that I`m not a feminist but rather a very sober hippy at heart with no desire for drama or performance.
Oh man, I`m all over the place this week. The old break-up is catching up to me I think along with the lack of sleep, new job, new hours, blah blah blah. Nope, I`m not trying to act like a victim here, I know that might be what some of you are thinking and that is far from the truth. I create my own reality, my own decisions have led to their own consequences. The fallout and reactions to my decisions are no one`s fault or responsibility but my own.
Anyway, I`m off to watch my movie and be a big hippy...hehe....
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