Okay, time for a totally awkward moment here. Apparently I'm going to be dating again whether I like it or not and honestly, I don't like it...not one bit. We're not going to go there right now though because I won't stop venting/stressing/typing/freaking. Now with that said, my well intentioned friends are either trying to set me up or coach me on how to pick someone up. Alright, "pick up" is the wrong choice of words there, I should be saying "ask someone out". I don't think I can do it to be honest, I'm still pretty fragile right now and I don't think I could handle someone saying, "with you? No way." I'm sure they'd be nicer but that's how it would sound in my brain. Psychological issues? Not really, just a broken heart.
So, one good friend is telling me that I am not allowed to date anyone without him meeting them first. This is all after a horrible, horrible date that left me reeling a little bit. You see, Arnold can come across as being a little overprotective of me and I love him to death for that but I think it might be difficult to explain to people that I'm not allowed to say yes or no until they meet my friend and he gives his approval. Almost sounds pimp-like. It's the farthest thing from that honestly, merely a good man looking out for his somewhat vulnerable friend. Sweetie. I wanna hug him every time I see him and for no other reason than he gives a damn.
Another friend is telling me just to jump in feet first and start asking whoever I happen to have a crush on for a date. Be aggressive in the 21st century. "Christ woman! Look at what you used to do! (insert reference to Lady A). Get some balls and just ask the guy!" I can't do that, I'm a freakshow, I know. Maybe she's right though, maybe I should just be aggressive. No, I changed my mind, I don't wanna be. I want to be the one who is pursued this time. Not in a creepy way either.
I think Maggpie is offering some of the best advice. It came in the form of text messages all day at work today and they read exactly like this:
- Don't avoid accidental eye contact, make lots of accidental eye contact because even if you can't say anything, eye contact is great. Usually flusters them.
- Flirt a little and if he doesn't ask you in a couple of days, you ask him. But seriously, lots of flirty eye contact. I may not be able to keep a man in my life but I sure as hell know how to catch em.
- Its all in the eyes, seriously!! Try to catch his eye a couple of times a day and don't look away too quick...not more than two times or you will look nuts!! And smile when he catches you looking, just a little, lol. Keep smiling when you look away, downwards is always best because it says, "ooops I got caught and now I'm shy about it."
- Bat your lashes.
Okay, I don't really get it because I think it's me subconsciously doing all of those things that got me into this trouble in the first place. Am I really ready for all of this nonsense?? I don't think I am. Does anyone else have advice besides batting my lashes or jumping someone?
That's it, I give up. I'm not dating, it's too complicated before I even started.
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