PREGNANT!!

Now that I've got your attention, I have to say that it's not me. There is a pregnancy happening in my house and that's HoneyCat, my little blonde kitty who sneaks out my windows for rendezvous with her tomcat lovers. She is supposed to stay in the house but when I moved to this new apartment she ran away for almost three weeks before I grabbed her out of the bushes and dragged her home.

After flea treatments and deworming and, luckily, no signs of pregnancy she seemed content to stay in the house with her sister/lesbian lover, Sasha. Yeah, they take care of each other when they're in heat, it's quite odd. So, I have incestuous gay kitties. However, that's neither here nor there right now. What's the main thing is that HoneyCat figured out she can come in and out of the windows when I open them to let fresh air in. The little brat didn't listen to me when we had the discussion about birth control. You know, typical of today's youth and their "it'll never happen to me" attitude. Well, it happened to her.

Now I have a cat in her first 3-5 weeks of pregnancy. Her belly is starting to balloon under her ribs, her nipples are getting large and pink, she's extra sookie and lovable AND I'm starting to be able to feel little golf balls in her belly. Now I have to prepare for a pregnancy and birth but I honestly have no clue as how to assist a cat through this life-altering time of her life. She's blessed to be a mother but she's not ready and neither am I.

We made a huge decision together based on poor HoneyCat's abilities and readiness to be a parent. She decided that she may only have the strength to raise her kittens for about eight weeks and, as a result, we are going the route of adoption. Abortion was discussed but she doesn't believe in it so we didn't even bother contacting the proper experts, IE: the vet. I'm happy for her decision to raise these kittens through their formative weeks but I would support her through any decision, including a kitty abortion.

Alright, I'm completely humanizing my cat and that's not always a good thing. Bottom line is that my sneaky feline got out of my window and got knocked up.

Anyone want a kitten??